


Vows (to be written; to be exchanged)

by elwon



Series: Exeunt'verse [9]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Character Study, Domestic Fluff, Exactly What It Says on the Tin, M/M, Musical References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-01
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-12-22 13:26:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11968341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elwon/pseuds/elwon
Summary: The ways things make sense to him won’t necessarily mean anyone else will make sense of them, and isn’t that sort of the whole point of wedding vows?





	Vows (to be written; to be exchanged)

Jason sits at the window, idly tapping his pen against the pad of paper propped up against the windowsill while he stares out at the smoggy Gotham sky. He knows roughly what he wants to say; it’s finding the right words in the right order. The fact that he’s going to have to stand up and declare them in front of people he respects and wants to impress is... daunting. Totally not terrifying, _daunting_. Yes. 

Sure, he could just go with the standard traditional vows; but Dick wants something personal. Jason already feels that he’s pushed far enough with having the actual legal ceremony at City Hall, no need for tuxes, a quick signing of forms with Jason’s legal but fake ID and just his family and Alfred there. So he can’t deny Dick the personal vows at the reception. There’s going to be a big celebration in the grounds of the manor with just about everyone Dick’s ever worked with (and in some cases dated), later on in the day. Jason’s not looking forward to it, but as soon as he saw how excited Dick was at the thought of it, Jason agreed without a second thought.

Jason can quote a lot of Shakespeare without even thinking too hard about it, but writing his own feelings for Dick down has left him wordless. Some things are too private, and he has a hard enough time saying them to Dick in the privacy of their home, let alone in front of anyone else. The mass of scribbles he’s accumulated is testament to that. Each time he’s thought of something he’s written it down and upon rereading, it’s either been too embarrassing, or too vague. The ways things make sense to him won’t necessarily mean anyone else will make sense of them, and isn’t that sort of the whole point of wedding vows?

***

Dick announces his return home from his run with an ear-splitting “Honey I’m home!” causing Jason to roll his eyes. Jason levers himself up from his seat by the window and follows Dick into the kitchen. He takes several long moments to appreciate the sight of Dick standing at the sink, drinking a large glass of water, clad in actual spandex for once. It’s an inspiring view, and one that has in the post made him burst into song (deliberately badly – if he makes it into a joke then maybe Dick won’t realise just how serious he is about it). He walks over to Dick, wrapping his arms around him and kissing his neck as he starts humming the usual song, before he actually sings a line or two.

“I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring, oh baby, I wanna get with you and take your picture, my homeboys tried to warn me, but that butt you got makes me so horny...” he tries to keep his voice toneless, but the tighter he squeezes Dick the more his voice slips into tune.

“Baby got back _again_ , Jay? Really? Can we not have a little variety?” Dick elbows him lightly, amusement clear on his face as he leans back into him.

“Well, excuse me for wanting to woo you with the most romantic song ever written. But fine, if you really want I can try something else.” He says, nuzzling behind Dick’s ear and the strands of hair from his outgrown haircut.

“Please. I’ll take anything at this point. As long as it’s in key.” Dick grins, twisting in his arms to press a light but lingering kiss to Jason’s lips.

“I am a wolf among men and I'll take what I can get. I am lost in your eyes and I'm filling with regret.” Jason sings quietly, growing in volume the more comfortable he gets. “Am I so different to you or are you the same as me? I'm lost in your eyes, I'm lost in your eyes, I'm lost in... Baaaby got baaaaaack, baby got baack.” Jason grins as Dick thumps at him in frustrated amusement. 

“Jason! That’s mean. Quit it!” Dick laughs, dropping his head onto Jason’s shoulder as he tries to hide his smile. 

***

“So, I finished my vows. How are yours coming along?” Dick asks as they go into the living room to prep ahead of time for the night’s patrol.

“Ugh. I think I’ve gone through an entire pad of paper trying to come up with something.” Jason complains, flopping back into his usual spot on the couch that he likes so much.

“I know you said you wanted to do them yourself, but are you sure you don’t want any help? I don’t mind and not to pressure you or anything, but you’re running out of time. I know don’t have to remind you the ceremony is next week.” Dick says, sitting down on the couch next to Jason with a hopeful look on his face.

“I know, I know. It’s just hard getting the words out of my head onto the paper without it being... well, fucking terrible.” Jason grumbles, picking up his jacket and a couple of smoke bombs to put in one of the zip up pockets in the lining. Who needs a utility belt? Not the Red Hood. Dick leans forward and picks up several discarded pieces of paper and leafs through them.

“I’m sure they’re not that...” Dick reads the paper that Jason pulls from the bottom of the pile and shoves under his nose. “OK that really is bad, damn Jay. I don’t think that last word is even a word.”

“Who would have thought that writing the vows would be the hardest part of planning a wedding?” Jason wonders aloud, putting his jacket down to take the discarded vows away from Dick.

“I know right? I swear moving in together was a thousand times easier.” Dick says, as if he still has things that need to be done. Jason knows that the tuxes are safe with Alfred, who’s also insisted on catering for their little reception, Drake and Damian have their rings, so the only thing that needs to be done, apart from turn up at City Hall at their appointed time, is Jason’s vows. 

“That’s because we didn’t plan that, Goldie. You just ended up spending six nights out of seven here, with the last night at the manor, so you gave up your apartment and told me you lived here now.” Jason points out, amused. Jason had been slightly woozy from blood loss at the time and so had agreed without even thinking. It wasn’t until the lesbian grandmas next door had congratulated him on finally getting that nice young man of his to move in that he realised it hadn’t been a surprisingly nice dream.

“And that worked out fine! I mean, ok, there were a few teething problems with the both of us having too much stuff for one apartment, but we figured that out pretty easy. I’m sure we can figure out your vows too.” Dick says, confident and optimistic. Seeing him like that gives Jason hope too.

Jason picks up the pad of paper from the coffee table and holds back the sigh that wants to escape. Nothing’s coming to mind right now, and Dick’s hopeful looks as they sit there are not helping. He stares at the blank sheet of paper, tapping the pen against it. He’s getting annoyed at himself for not being able to write a short little speech when he can memorise entire plays to recite.

“Ugh, this is stupid. I can’t think of a damn thing! I’m useless; I don’t know why you put up with me.” Jason grumbles, tossing the pad back onto the coffee table with irritation. He pushes his hand through his hair, trying to push a decent idea into his head through sheer will.

“I put up with you because I love you, even when you’re being an asshole, because you’re my asshole.” Dick says, shoving the picking up the pad and shoving it back into Jason’s hands, and giving him a look that says ‘I love you but stop whining’.

“Thanks, Dickie, real helpful there. Is that in your vows? Because it should be. ‘I’m marrying an asshole,’ so everyone can feel sorry for you getting stuck with me.” Jason sighs, his irritation getting the better of him. 

“Come on Jay, stop trying to pick a fight just because I got mine finished and you haven’t.” Dick tries to placate him, even though it’s obvious that Jason’s attitude is pissing him off. “OK, so all your attempts so far have been terrible and I honestly think that last one must have been written drunk, that doesn’t mean you can’t think of anything at all.”

“Yeah, well, clearly I’m unlovable asshole, and I can’t even think of how to say I love you.” Jason mutters, trying and failing to keep calm. He stands up; pacing back and forth a step or two, hoping motion will help keep him calm. He doesn’t actually want this to spin from a simple disagreement into an actual argument, but the more they talk about it, the more Jason can feel that he wants to just shout all his frustration out. 

“Well, you know what they say; you can’t love someone unless you love yourself.” Dick quotes in a low voice, obviously far more irritated than he’ll admit, posture stiff as he stands up too, as if he thinks Jason’s being difficult deliberately. 

“Bullshit. I’ve never loved myself, but you? Oh god. I love you so much I’ve forgotten what hating myself feels like.” Jason snaps back, gripping the pad of paper hard enough that his fingers are beginning to tear holes into the sheets. He glares at the ceiling waiting for Dick’s no doubt pissy response to that. When it’s not forthcoming, Jason forces his gaze down and over to Dick, who’s looking back at him with eyes wide and a hand pressed to his mouth. Dick makes a choked sound, swaying in indecision before he steps over to Jason, throwing his arms around him. Jason staggers back a step with the unexpected weight, arms automatically going up and around Dick to hold him close and safe.

“I love you too, Jay. So, so much. I can’t even imagine my life without you anymore. I don’t even want to!” Dick says into Jason’s neck, clinging on with all his strength. “I’m sorry, I can see you’re twisting yourself up in knots over this, and I just want to help.” Jason tilts them back until they land on the couch, sprawling out while keeping a tight hold on each other. Dick’s head tilts at an odd angle, and he drops one arm to pick up a discarded sheet of paper. He shifts to read it, and then turns to Jason with that one small fond smile on his face that Jason can never say no to. He can resist the puppy eyes, but that quiet real smile? It’s his undoing and he will never ever tell Dick that. “You know I think I’ve worked out why you’re having such trouble with writing your vows.” Jason raises an eyebrow and makes a go on gesture with a jerk of his head. “You’ve already written them.”

Jason blinks at Dick, and then flicks his gaze to his discarded very first attempt. Jason frowns, taking the sheet of paper from Dick.

“But they’re kinda short, and really vague. They don’t make sense to anyone but me. And I don’t really want to explain them to everyone when we’re standing in front of the judge, Dickie.” Jason sighs, frustrated.

“So explain them to me now. Who cares if no one else knows what they mean as long as we do?” Dick points out, with that soft, fond smile of his. “It’s not like I’m going to forget this conversation. My vows are short too.”

“I. Ah, ok so this is gonna sound stupid, but whatever. I mean you’re marrying me, so it’s not like you don’t know what you’re getting into, right?” Jason says, shifting to open up his laptop and opens up his internet browser to search for one thing in particular. “OK, so when I was a kid, my mom came home one day with this bundle of cd’s from Goodwill. And there was this one song; it was kinda sappy as fuck, which I didn’t like, but... Well, it was the first time I ever heard anyone talk like the way I felt. Not what he was singing about, I was like eight and it was a love song, but the way he was singing about it? I guess it just stuck with me.”

“I think I want to hear this song.” Dick says, softly, honoured that Jason’s trusting him with a bit more of his past, especially a part that he rarely ever talks about.

“Yeah, hang on, let me queue it up for you. Anyway, so... I guess this song is pretty much how I do feel about you now.” Jason shifts, uncomfortable and swallows against a dry throat as he hits play. He watches as Dick closes his eyes to listen better to the strumming of the guitar and lets the lyrics wash over him until the track finishes and Dick opens his eyes again.

“So, when I was a kid I used to stare out at the sky hoping to catch a glimpse of your cape, yanno, all gold against the cold grey of Gotham, and I don’t know, Robin meant hope to me back then. I guess.” Jason glances down to Dick’s face, resting on his shoulder, paying full attention to what Jason is saying with a concentration that makes Jason feel loved. “Then I died and when I came back everything was red rage and the acid green of the Lazarus Pit. And then we got to together and I knew what gold felt like just being with you. So, yeah, that’s what that version of my vows means.”

“Jason... They’re perfect. Way better than mine.” Dick leans up, pressing a kiss to Jason’s jaw, that heart melting smile still on his face.

“You, you think so? Not just saying that to stop me stressing?” Jason says, not entirely convinced, but seriously not wanting to have to keep trying to rewrite the damn things.

“No. I mean it. They’re perfect and I want to hear you say them to me in front of the judge.” Dick smiles at him. “Although you not stressing is definitely a bonus.”

“Hmmm. I guess I owe you for helping me though.” Jason grins, suddenly sitting up and manhandling Dick in his arms into a princess carry. 

“What the! Jay! You don’t owe me. But if this is heading where I think it’s heading, then yes please!” Dick looks entirely too pleased with himself, but Jason figures that this time he’s earned that look.

“The bedroom?” Jason’s pretty sure they’re both wanting to blow off the stress with some good sweaty mindless fucking, and maybe a nice long shower after too, and then patrol and kick some heads in. Yeah, life’s good. 

“To the bedroom!” Dick declares, throwing an arm out in the most ridiculous manner that Jason can’t hold back his smile at his fiancé’s antics.

Jason hefts him in his arms again, getting a better grip and walks to the bedroom. He kicks the door shut behind him as Dick laughs as he lands on the bed and bounces.

Oh yeah, he finally got his gold.

***

Dick’s vows:  
‘I’ve been a performer all my life, but until I found you, it was a script for one.  
Now, I feel like I've got a standing ovation with the spotlight just on me when you look at me.  
There’s little better than flying through air, knowing you’ll catch me, always, for the rest of our lives.’ 

Jason’s vows:  
‘It’s always been you. Before I even met you, I was looking for you.  
I came back, and the grey, black, red and green I was drowning in faded away around you.  
It’ll only ever be you, because you are my gold.’

**Author's Note:**

> Jonathan Coulton’s whitest-boy-ever cover of Sir Mixalot’s [Baby Got Back](www.youtube.com/watch?v=f6mAeipSTvs)
> 
> Maxïmo Park’s [Wolf Among Men](www.youtube.com/watch?v=my0ONItEcfE)
> 
> Darius Danesh-Campbell’s [Colourblind](www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QOui-otJlQ)


End file.
